Courses at work are kind of like a mini holiday – without the cocktails. They get you away from your desk – no demanding boss, no telephone ringing all the time – just little easy exercises and a nice safe environment in which to stretch your mind and giggle at childish jokes at the back of the room with your friends. Nothing like a learning situation to bring out the twelve year old in you.
This week I’m taking part in a course which involved a group negotiation that was then recorded on an old tape machine and played back to us a day later. I think the idea was for us to identify our negotiation styles and develop our collaboration skills. Unfortunately what I learned about myself was utterly horrifying. Not that I was being a bad negotiator or anything – I am talking about how my voice sounded on the tape. Who is this excited leprechaun on helium we all wondered as faces looked around until they eventually settled one by one on my glowing face. ‘The batteries must be running down prematurely’ I ventured nervously - ’there is no way my accent could possibly sound that strong’. I mean I was a whisker away from being in a Lucky Charms commercial and jumping up and down wishing everyone ‘The top of the morning’.
I had always thought that I was one of the few people in the whole world not to have any trace of an accent. I’ve been explaining to people for years that it was because I had been a language teacher and have lived so many years away from home. I now understand why they always looked at me incredulously.
You can take Conortje out of Ireland but a Kerryman he remains. Bless you all, I’m off to polish my shillelagh.
lol. i sound like a “cockney-sparra” on tape. . i’m not even from London. you’ve made me feel much better hehehehe
Heh! I have no accent because like you I’ve lived away from home for many years and I too was a language teacher.
I’m just not silly enough to go near a tape recorder…
Faith and begorrah Conor young man. Sher don’t ya like the shpuds an’ all when yer over on the oul sod?
Jokes aside, I keep hearing the words ‘posh bastard’ in my head when I hear my own voice played back to me. I recently convened six focus groups as part of my work. I’ve got over six hours more to get through….
townygirl – oohh I suffer too from wandering accent syndrome – very embarrassing
caro – well I too have learned my lesson – once bitten and all that
73man – six hours – pure and utter torture you poor thing
On tape, sometimes I sound like a guy. Sometimes I have this smokey voice that makes me sound like the next thing I’ll say is the price for a night.
So if the accent is the only thing you have to complain about…
You need to take lessons in losing your accent from my husband. He is from Co. Meath and apparently when he went Trinity he realized that all the rich kids thought he was an oik and so he got rid of his country accent, which I don’t know if i wholeheartedly approve of! being dissaproved of by snobs then becoming a snob. the only way you can tell he is irish now is by his white skin, freckles, poor dress sense and the sight of his curly wayward hair that only seems to grow on irish heads
You, Irish? I wouldn’t have noticed
I do wonder though what constitutes “no accent” in English.
You should try having a posh London voice in a room full of Irish accents. Or a room full of Estuary English. That causes a stir. And it’s funny how many sales people respond by calling me Sir. I always look round to see who they’re talking to and then realise it must be me.
It could be worse, you might sound like me!!!!!
Hee hee. Lucky Charms, is it?
It is a fright to hear yourself on tape, Conor. I cringe when I hear my own voice. I love having the computerized message on the voicemail say everything for me.
It’s why I hate talking on the phone. I know I sound like a girl on helium
i think we should all post audio clips!
“Courses at work are kind of like a mini holiday – without the cocktails”
My courses at work actually have the cocktails, beers, wine…..
I was on the radio on Friday last week. I heard it on Saturday and it was the most excruciating thing ever. I need a new voice. Something manly would be nice.
Having to listen to my own voice is one of the main things that drove me away from a career in radio. I’d like to soften up and eventually lose my accent, but it just doesn’t seem like it’s happening and I don’t want to fake it.
lenfercest – now I have an image of you sounding like Kim Deal from the Pixies – and she’s incredibly sexy
emmak – has he grown a Dublin 4 accent? urghhhh
hidh – just a little bit
nick – you should make the most of it sir!
grannymar – now I’ve heard your voice and it sounds wonderful. Warm, friendly and entertaining.
medbh – next time I’ve going to try and sound like the voicemail voice I reckon
alan – not a fan of the phone myself I must say but for other reasons
savannah – you first
manuel – please tell me you’re not allowed drink during your courses. I’m seriously considering a career move if that is the case
ann – a fake accent is indeed the worst – as we all know from the hollywood oirish accents hehe
But Irish accents are so SEXY!!!
I’m in voice therapy for some badly needed tinkering and the ‘ideal’ voice they’ve cooked up for me using all sorts of high tech jiggery pokery has me sounding like a Dublin 4 rugby groupie.
That’s bad enough but it turned out that that was my normal speaking voice phased into a female range.
I’m off to put my head in the oven.
I found out something horrifying after seeing myself on video – that I had a limp wrist and a spaz hand when I walked, which I had absolutely no idea about. Hearing yourself is bad, but watching yourself… it scars you for life!
well, sugar, i would if i could, but techno doofus that i am…i can’t
Irish accent IS sexy!
My accent sucks, it’s a mix of everything. People say it’s cute, but you know the definition of cute right?
now I have an image of you sounding like Kim Deal from the Pixies – and she’s incredibly sexy
that’s nice to know
… but sometimes I wish I sounded more like a girl!
Some times we have to drink. In the run up to a new wine list we are at it every day! 5 O’clock is corking time….
there’s nothing worse than listening to your own voice on tape. mine sounds like my adenoids need to be removed.
Like children, little Kerrymen should be seen, not heard.
steph – they are????
hq – hehe oh I really hope I do get to hear your voice some day – you realise I will take the piss after this knowledge no matter what you sound like
newbie – the mere thought makes me shudder
gaye – oh dear, I often get called cute and it always makes me fear the worst too
lenfercest – ok now I’m imagining something more like Marianne Faithfull hehehe
manuel – how about we swap lives for a month. Obviously a month when there’s a new wine list
laurie – it should simply be banned. In Conorland there’ll be no voice recordings – unless sung of course
primal – ahh I see that Kerry jealousy is still rife. Good to know
Which reminds me of the old joke that you can take a catholic girl out of Cork….
Oh god, that’s funny. If it makes you feel better, there are lots of us out there who would buy you drinks if you would just talk to us in that accent.
nick2 – hehehe quite
sassy – what? I can gain free drinks from this? – runs off to take course on strengthening accent
You know, I always thought you had a perfectly respectable mild Conorland twang. You shouldn’t have tried to change it to impress your workmates. After all, the Conorland accent was recently voted best in the world (for the second year running) in the Global Accent Awards.
nick – well I don’t like to publicise these things. You know how ridiculously modest I am.
conortje…no, he hasn’t grown a Dublin 4 accent, he just has a non-accent. No one has any idea where he is from and now he has been here in the US for seven years he sounds a bit like a Yank. What a chameleon eh?? he should have been a spy.
I feel your pain. When I’m taped I end up sounding like one of the Sopranos. It’s not pretty.
I often get called cute and it always makes me fear the worst too
It should make you fear the best. Listen to a girl’s advice.
at least you’re to thine own self being true (or something like that)
it’s been pointed out to me that my accent changes drastically depending on who i’m speaking to, either subconsciously trying to flatter them by imitating their accent or shamelessly hamming up the oirishness to flirt with handsome foreigners.
how slutty!
Rosie, did we attend the same course: “Use of Accent to Flatter Strange Men”?
I dread to think the number of times I’ve pretended to be an Afrikaner or a generic Slav simply to ‘impress’someone. Needless to say, I’ve never been sober in those moments.
emmak – so long as it’s not Dublin 4 we don’t mind
beth – the sopranos is definitely better than a hyperactive leprechaun though
lenfercest – okay then, if you insist
rosie – how fabulous. Whenever I try and do any accent no matter what it is I end up with some weird Welsh/Indian hybrid
Jovica – I thought you were actually giving the course. No?