I’m coming down fast but I’m miles above you

I could measure out my life in The Netherlands in bikes I’ve had. On last count it was six. You cannot call yourself fully integrated into Dutch society until you’ve had at least two bikes stolen. I’ve had two and half taken from me. The half was when I actually caught the thief wheeling my bike away. I rushed up to him in a fit of superherotacklingcrimeness and yelled Hey that’s my bike! He replied, oh is it? as he politely handed it back acting as if he had merely mistaken it for his own and not broken the lock in the process.

Almost worse than the bike thieves are the bicycle repairmen. They are the laziest bunch of scoundrels (don’t you just love that word) I’ve had to deal with. No matter what is wrong with your bike they will invariably tell you that it would be cheaper to buy a new one than get this one repaired. And bikes are far from cheap in this country. Even the falling to pieces ones that nobody would want will set you back almost 100 euro.

This is why I am very very sad that my current bike is on its way out. The back wheel seems to be suffering from some sort of progressive buckling process making it harder and harder daily to get from A to B. Perhaps it’s fed up with maniac drivers and is coming down with a dose of metal fatigue. I wouldn’t blame it. But because I’m loathe to bring it to the bike hospital or trade it in, I am cycling about town in an embarrassingly erratic way. It’s like riding a bike that’s having a permanent epileptic fit. Strangely though I have found that the faster I cycle the less I feel the wobble. This is surely going to lead to my grizzly demise on the Dutch bike paths. In the meantime I will see how long I can string it out for. Being without a bike in The Netherlands is like being in the middle of the Irish countryside without a car. Apart from all the, trams, trains and busses galore we have here I suppose. 

What I am going to do until I come up with a better plan is pretend that I’m on a bucking bronco - who would have thought that cycling to work could be so much fun?