I missed my 100th post. God only knows when that was but I’m going to tip my fedora to tradition and mangle it up at the same time by instead marking this, my 200th post, with 200 things about me that nobody needed to know.
A prize of my baffled respect to the person who reads the furthest before falling asleep. Best to get comfortable with a tall cocktail before attempting this. So without further adon’t…
1. I am scared of electricity.
2. I once went to Chris de Burgh’s house to see if he was at home. He was.
3. Until age 29 my waist was 32″ now it is 30″ but threatening a return to 31″
4. I am vegetarian and yes this means I don’t eat fish or chicken either.
5. Bosnia is my favourite Balkan country. It’s incredibly beautiful.
6. I think that coca- cola out of a can tastes better than out of a bottle.
7. My favourite song of all time is The Beatles A day in the Life.
8. I can’t draw. At all, at all.
9. I was expelled from play school.
10. I am allergic to kiwis.
11. I think 3/4 length trousers look very silly.
12. I love taking photographs but I haven’t a clue what most of the buttons on the camera are for.
13. That embarrasses me.
14. I used to smoke. A lot – up to 30 a day. I quit a few years ago and am very glad I did.
15. I sweat very easily.
16. That too embarrasses me.
17. When I was 14 I wrote a bunch of poems and sent them to publishers.
18. and yes, that also embarrasses me.
19. Around the same time I wrote to the president of the USA informing him that, in my opinion, they should abolish the death penalty.
20. I love Canada and Canadians even though I’ve never been there. Yet.
21. I make fresh pesto almost every week. I’m addicted.
22. I have a degree in Geology.
23. I am baffled why the British TV presenter Jonathan Ross is so popular. I find him appallingly bad.
24. La Isla Bonita is my favourite Madonna song.
25. I find Madonna incredibly overrated.
26. When I was four I wanted to be a priest.
27. I once went to school with sanitary towels in my shoes.
28. I had chicken pox when I was 16.
29. I caught it off my sexy Chemistry teacher.
30. I have had dinner with a Nobel peace prize winner.
31. My ideal ‘famous’ man is Sufjan Stevens.
32. I hate almost all Hollywood films.
33. I can make paper frogs and fish.
34. Whenever I see one magpie on its own I have to say No, no thank you Mr Magpie while tugging my forelock.
35. When I was a very little boy I put our pet dog in the toilet and flushed it thinking it was the ideal doggie shower.
36. He survived but would never be seen in the same room as me again.
37. I do a mean Kermit the Frog impression.
38. Until only a few years ago I though he was called Kermit de Frog like Chris de Burgh.
39. I am hugely anti-royalty.
40. My favourite film is Cinema Paradiso.
41. Favourite TV show is Northern Exposure.
42. The only show that came close for me since then was Six Feet Under.
43. Ever since we made banana flavouring in the chemistry lab in university I cannot bring myself to eat banana-flavoured products.
44. I don’t read anywhere near enough poetry.
45. The worst pain I’ve experienced so far was after my wisdom tooth was removed. One whole week of agony (apparently I had a dry cavity).
46. I often consider getting a tattoo.
47. The best concerts I have been to were by Sinead O’Connor, Andrew Bird, Patty Griffin and Aimee Mann.
48. I have met and talked to Patty Griffin, The Frames, Ray LaMontagne, Grant Lee Phillips, among many others great artists.
49. I turned 21 on the very day I got my university degree.
50. I consider pancake mix one of the world’s most pointless inventions. Since you have to add milk and eggs anyway why not just use flour?
51. I can play about three tunes on the tin whistle and muster a few chords on the guitar, but I reckon I can sing better.
52. I failed the audition for the school choir.
53. I once accidentally went to a Gerard Joling concert. Only Dutch people will really understand how incredibly embarrassing it is to admit this.
54. I believe in love.
55. I have bucked teeth.
56. I always say One Hundred Years of Solitude is my favourite book but I have such a long list of remarkable books I’ve read it would be really hard to commit to a real favourite.
57. Whenever I try and speak Irish these days it comes out as Dutch.
58. I am the youngest of six children.
59. That probably explains a lot.
60. I love the smell of petrol.
61. I eat the same lunch almost every day (Italian Salad).
62. I once died my hair yellowish. It was supposed to turn out blonde but trust me, it was yellow-ish.
63. I did NOT have more fun at the time.
64. I love Autumn in The Netherlands.
65. I named Hill Walking in my CV as one of my interests.
66. This came as a surprise last time I looked at my CV seeing as I’m not all that into hills and live in one of the flattest countries in the world.
67. I have one less saliva gland than I should as it was surgically removed!
68. I once posed nude for an erotic magazine.
69. I am slightly intimidated by banks.
70. I always say a silent prayer when taking off in an airplane.
71. I was the first person in my class to be allowed write in pen instead of pencil.
72. Amazingly I am still very proud of this.
73. I bite my nails because a nail scissors can never do it quite as well.
74. It really annoys me that I am not allowed vote in Irish elections because I live abroad.
75. I failed my first driving test and passed the second one even though I drove MUCH better the first time round.
76. I love travelling. If I could finance it I would do it all the time.
77. I’d love to be able to juggle.
78. I have a blackboard on my kitchen door.
79. In my right eye I have a little brown fleck that someone very very clever (who also had one) told me was a sign of genius.
80. I am, sadly, not a genius.
81. I am however a little bit brilliant.
82. I do really badly in those tests that involve looking at three bizarre shapes and ask you which odd shape comes next.
83. I only ever go to church at Christmas when I am at home.
84. I much prefer gas ovens to electric ones.
85. I love the word ilk.
86. In my previous passport I had my name in Irish.
87. This caused confusion wherever I went.
88. I once milked a stray goat.
89. When I was a wee lad I wrote to Jim’ll Fix It.
90. He didn’t 😦
91. I played Jezebel, the Inn Keeper’s wife in the school nativity play.
92. I LOVE the Muppets.
93. I once accidentally ate some turkey at Dublin airport thinking it was cheese.
94. Clifden is my least favourite town in Ireland.
95. I can say ‘Sit on my face but don’t hurt me’ in Tagalog
96. I have never had nits.
97. The only test I ever failed was my first driving test.
98. I have a thing for French policemen.
99. I’d love to meet a friendly ghost.
100. My neighbour’s name is Casper incidentally.
101. I have only once been in a helicopter and I loved it.
102. My latest favourite beer is Westmalle.
103. I pee an awful lot.
104. I need eight hours a sleep a night.
105. Blue is my favourite colour.
106. I have a long weekend every 2nd week.
107. I used to suck my fingers until I was way too old (explaining no. 55).
108. I love having baths.
109. Red wine puts me to sleep.
110. I kissed a girl and I liked it.
111. I didn’t have a boyfriend at the time.
112. I spend most of my money on music and clothes.
113. I once sat in the cockpit of a plane while it landed at Schiphol – it was amazing.
114. I can’t stand Oasis.
115. Slea head in Dingle is probably my favourite place in the world.
116. I love pancakes yet rarely eat them.
117. My sister used to sellotape my ears back so they wouldn’t look so big.
118. It didn’t work.
119. I think the Irish flag looks boring.
120. I’d love to go to North Korea.
121. I am totally in lust with Seth Gilliam from The Wire.
122. I only have one kidney.
123. I only eat Granny Smith apples (and they have to be chilled).
124. I love Christmas.
125. I like to celebrate my half birthday.
126. I am quite the awkward person.
127. This pleases me.
128. I have sarcoidosis.
129. I like sticking my tongue out at people.
130. I detest canned pineapple but love the real deal.
131. Anytime I try and do an accent I end up sounding a hybrid of Welsh and Indian no matter what I was trying for.
132. I have an impressive scar underneath my chin.
133. I pretend it’s due to me saving a granny from a group of thugs but really it’s from an operation (see No. 67).
134. We have a Johnny Logan picture of the month in my office. (Needless to say this is for comedy value)
135. There is a brandy butter war at home every christmas where my sisters and brother fight each other to find where my mother hid it.
136. I am doing a masters degree in Human Resources Development.
137. This was probably a silly move as it’s fairly obvious I’m destined to be an international rock megastar.
138. I eat an apple a day.
139. The only sporty type activity I do is sweaty yoga, better known as Bikram Yoga.
140. I make my own Christmas cards.
141. February is my least favourite month.
142. Tuesday is my least favourite day.
143. 3 pm is my least favourite time of day.
144. 3pm on Tuesdays in February is PAINFUL.
145. I HATE the smell of weed (as in the drug).
146. I have four sisters and one brother.
147. I have three loud nephews and one niece.
148. I eat way too much chewing gum and am trying to cut down.
149. I know far too much about child birth after sharing an office with two constantly pregnant women.
150. I have a plan.
151. I love growing plants.
152. I’m currently growing an avocado plant from an avocado stone and a pepper plant from red pepper seeds.
153. I get a Greenpeace calendar every year for my office.
154. I cycle to work.
155. It takes less than ten minutes.
156. I always take a packet of tissues with me wherever I go.
157. I usually consult a dictionary at least once a day.
158. I love going to concerts – hard to beat live music.
159. I’ve been in my current job for eight years.
160. I won’t be in it for much longer though as the place is closing down.
161. I hate feet (although I do accept they are quite useful).
162. I am a great procrastinator.
163. I hate talking on the phone.
164. I used to own a ridiculously bright yellow shirt.
165. I don’t know what I was thinking either.
166. I used to make ‘art’ on Excel.
167. I was the only person to recognise my brilliance in that.
168. My middle name is Paul.
169. My confirmation name is Francis.
170. It annoys the hell out of me that people have started saying ‘I’m loving..’ or ‘I’m liking…’ it’s bad English that McDonalds have made acceptable.
171. I love Dr. Seuss. This is one of my favourite quotes from him –
Look what we found
in the park
in the dark.
We will take him home.
We will call him Clark.
172. I know where Bono lives.
173. I have a bizarre affection for the Eurovision Song Contest.
174. Let’s never speak of this again.
175. I went to university in Galway (NUIG).
176. Even though I am right-handed I use my left hand to work the mouse of the computer.
177. This is because of RSI.
178. I have had three bikes stolen.
179. One was right next to a police booth at the time.
180. I am ridiculously happy about the smoking ban.
181. I love writing lists (eg favourite albums of the year).
182. I love the sea.
183. I’m also a little scared of it.
184. I have a glorious weakness for champagne.
185. My first trip out of Europe was to New York in March 2008. I loved it so much I went back two months later.
186. I want to go again!
187. I can say ‘I have an axe at home’ in Serbo-Croat.
188. My favourite ice-cream flavour is pistachio, followed closely by coconut.
189. I had an imaginary friend when I was wee.
190. He was called Charlie Maggie.
191. I love getting my shoulders massaged.
192. The food item I miss most from Ireland is Chocolate Kimberly’s.
193. The only magazine I regularly read is Uncut.
194. I’ve never been to a music festival because I like my comforts too much.
195. I prefer dark chocolate to milk or white.
196. I once accidentally buried a terrapin alive while he was hibernating. I thought he was dead.
197. My classic scent is Eternity for Men.
198. I’m a Gemini.
199. and so am I.
200. Number 68 was a lie 🙂
Conortje 
Number 88 – why?
Number 164 – it still haunts me.
Number 188 – snap.
191 – I know I know
tallulahbloom – why? becuase it was there and so was I…
I wouldn’t have put 68 past you!
And 134 amuses me no end… I’ve still not recovered from those Centerparcs ads.
Sneaky, should have put that at 69 though for the fnah, fnah sleaze value!
Cinema Paradiso is a wee cracker alright.
Those shaker pancake mixes (just add milk!) are the biz, they really do save time….
catherine – you should see this months – the cover from his new album apparently – called Irishman in America hehe
aidan – but how much time does it really save? ten seconds? Okay maybe I should try it again..
Not that I want to reignite the Sufjan-is-MY-husband wars or anything, but Seth Gilliam is mine. All mine. I mean that. No comebacks. (You can have Sufjan now).
Seth=mine. Seth ≠ yours.
Got it?
“aidan – but how much time does it really save? ten seconds? ”
Conor, preparing batter not so much but no washing up of horrible mixing bowl – just shake and go! Plus they taste the same every time unlike my home-made efforts……..
27 – Why?
82 – Me too!
172 – I think that knowledge comes standard with an Irish Passport. 🙂
eguigan – do you honestly expect me to give him up that easily? You disappoint me Enda!
aidan – if it makes the washing up easier I’m all in
ann – https://conortje.wordpress.com/2007/04/27/toys-for-boys/
I love that list. Made me laughho many things we have in common, paricularly writing lists!
oh and 187, hilarious. let’s hope it’s never needed lol.
#88 poor goat
#98 I agree, and yes, it’s the zips that go up, not down
#114 ditto. je les déteste aussi
#120 i’ve seen it. from the SK border fence. it looked quite nice.
#68 way-hay!
#100 boo-hoo!
First off – great lyric. I shall be singing that track all day now.
7. My favourite song of all time is The Beatles A day in the Life.
I don’t know how I could possible pick a favourite song of all time – it changes so often. At the moment it’s probably Springsteen’s “Secret Garden” or “The Weight” by The Band.
10. I am allergic to kiwis.
The fruit or the people?
39. I am hugely anti-royalty.
Again, the fees paid to musicians or the people?
So, number 1, scared of electricity. Zzzzzzzz. Hey, respect, brudda. Give the dude a chance. Okay, 200, it was a lie. You know what, Conor, you’re totally unique, totally a one-off. I just love that, so rare these days.
I also sweat a lot. I also think Madonna’s over-rated. I suspect 97 is also a lie. And I think you’ve missed a few things. 201, you’re a great denier. 202, you have a problem buying suits. 203, you can’t say “Can I borrow a machete?” in Latvian.
towngirl – you just never know when such a phrase will come in handy
travelling – I want one of their uniforms for christmas – those zips are deadly 🙂
BA – great song isn’t it! Oh and I meant the fruit and the king and queen types – the musicians deserve every cent they can get.
nick – Hmm that makes me want to go off and learn it hehe Thanks for the kind words.
Made it to 200 over oatmeal and OJ, no problem!
robin – you’re made of strong stuff!
Conor what a wonderful, exuberant, mercurial list. I picked up the link between 137 and 22 – very punny. I also picked up the link between 150 and 156 – you’ll go blind. Looking at this list, I think of it as two giant parentheses, with “I believe in love” buried meekly in the middle.
This is why I like reading this blog!
This is quite possibly the most creatively inspirational collection of thoughts I’ve read all week. It captures the essence of Number 7 indeed…
9. Conortje the rebel …
25. Wiliam Orbit saved her career just as Brian Eno saved U2’s
31. Sufjan’s the man alright. Wonder if he’l add to the ‘Chicago’ songs now that Obama has become at least the fifth most famous Chicagoean
39. With you on that one. Bea and the Oranjes are even more obnoxious than Brenda and the Windsors. At least the Windsors have no pretentions about being anything other than thick royals
47. Too many to mention …
53. Conortje, you have no taste. don’t you know that Andre Hazes was the one and only …
66. Quite
69. I want to rob one
70. Can’t think of a better place to do that
119. One of the worst colour combinations ever
162. Pretty impressive list, all the same.
martin – and that thought of yours is why I enjoy readiing yours so much!
ben – that’s all my inspiration used up for the year now I fear
tony – tell me about it – I’m exhausted 🙂 I’ve yet to watch the Andre Hazes film – I’ve heard great things about it surprisingly…
The Andre Hazes thing was tongue-in-cheek, but who knows, in the true spirit of post-modernism, perhaps he, like everything else, eventually becomes cool …
you and i are, like, twins. especially the camera-not-understanding-the-buttons part.
but i have never put sanitary towels in my shoes
15: My bf does that too, and he insists it has something to do with having red hair. But perhaps having celtic genes is the common denominator then.
Brilliant list! You have excellent taste, several of your favourites are mine too. I wish you lived nearby so I could borrow your stuff.
According to no. 156 you are more of a real woman than me in the Italian’s books…
tony – what I did see and loved was the Ramses Shaffy film – unexpectedly moving.
laurie – hehe well believe me I wish I hadn’t
hidh – I’m still hoping it has some hidden advantage
caro – oh dear hehe well I blame it on my sensitive nose – I only have to think about dust and my nose is running
oh, that was interesting. i feel the same about 74.
You were a genius child. I don’t know how I missed that post the first time around.
Cinema Paradiso. YUM.
Yeah. Madonna. Overrated.
And yeah. most of your list. I always make my own cards.
How does one make banana flavouring? I used to love banana icecream, but only when I was a child.
Random thought: did you see “Antonia’s Line”?
XO
WWW
Now I want to know about the banana flavouring. And I was just complaining about #170 today.
I can’t tell you how relieved I am to have number 96 (nits) confirmed, and I have friends that would do all kinds of illegal things for that Bono information. My favourite thing about 176, however, comes a little later: “Will our mother like this? We don’t know.” It’s inspirational, really. 🙂
28 and 131 – freaky, exactly the same for me. I got my pocks (pox?) while on holidays in New York at 16…
I’ve spoken to Ray Lamontagne too(small hall paradiso couple of years back?), the softest spoken man ever. I’ve spoken to glen hansard too but he was busy chatting up my housmate.
Clearly, I meant 171.
(clears throat, adjusts collar)
I’m jealsous of #3
what is it #150 ?
#176 – now that’s talent!
Happy 200th – and you wonder why kids think yer auld!
Grrrr. I know where you live. And if I get the technology to triangulate your exact location using your IP address and some Sellotape, I will.
Seth 4 evah!
red – and my interesting do you mean tiresome hehe
ann – well I suppose genius is one way of looking at it. A way I like as it happens…
www – I can’t really remember but basically it was all chemicals, tasty stufF! I’ve haven’t seen Antonia’s Line – would you recommend?
tornwordo – I find it INCREDIBLY annoying. We should protest.
brad – hehe I was trying to figure out for ages what my mother had to do with RSI hehe
xbox – sick at 16 in new york is just not fair, you poor thing. I hope you’ve been back since.
quickroute – ahh that is the big question…what is my plan…all will be revealed in due time.. (I like my dots today it seems)
eguinan – couldn’t we share him – every other weekend?
xbox – by the way that was the very same concert I was at – we must have seen each other.Just got tickets to see him again in Paradiso in February!
how cool are you, sugar? well done! xoxxoo 😉
I love the Muppets too. Although I was absolutely terrified of Dr Bunsen. Had a couple of nightmares about him as a small child and thereafter always viewed him with suspicion 🙂
‘Im allergic to kiwis” . . .Why, what did a New Zealander ever do to you?
68: pictures or it didn’t happen.
200. Oh…
No. 6 YES YES YES it’s so true, and possibly the most satisfying sound on opening. Also on No. 119, I’ve always lamented how cool a Union Jack can look on a tshirt, but the poor aul tricolour really just doesn’t.
bwahahahahaha love it! what did you ask Jim’ll fix it to fix? I asked him to “fix” my mum (she wasn’t well)……but he didn’t…….bastard, still hate him for that
So were you expelled from playschool because of the sanitrary towels or the love of the smell of petrol?
Are you afraid of pylons? I’ve yet to find anyone who has as great a fear of those things as I do. I hate electricity. *shudder*
Also, I wasn’t aware of Sarcoidosis before, but I’m pretty convinced I have it too, now. If I don’t, I’ve just given it to myself.
Liar. No 68 knocked No.27 off my top spot.
I’m impressed that I didn’t need to look up the definition of sarcoidosis. I watch far too much House.
55 & 107 – me too.
49 almost made me stop reading the list because it’s just too depressing.
53 – you didn’t! about the accidentally I mean.
73 – I totally agree.
92 – so do I!
8 – Me neither, at all at all
14- big hugs and kudos for quitting the poison stuff
20 – Canada is absolutely gorgeous, wonderfully multicultural, great people I could have stayed there forever!
33 – paper boat and frog, here.
40 – ditto Paradiso best film ever, then Amelie and Delicatessen
((Oh fiddlesticks, this is too difficult! Conor it is like reading 200 separate extremely short posts, I could write 200 comments under each! ))
46- What would you get?
68 – I want to see!
84 – gas ovens and cooktops rule!
85 – why?
94 – again why?
114 – ditto
122- what happened to the other?
too many ditto’s between that and next
166 – you too?
170- I am loving your list at the moment. What’s wrong with loving it right now? Maybe I will not love it by the time I get to the end! Sheesh.
172- I know where Bono lives also, I went up to see if he was in, he wasn.t
182 – Me too! I was a dolphin in previous life, I got caught in tuna nets but I jumped over it and survived. If it weren’t for that damn orca…
188 – Ice cream pistachio!! Yummm, you should try it in Turkey, the best I have ever had! (I can’t believe you mistook turkey for cheese by the way)
(Phew I am almost there)
191-I’ll give you a shoulder and back massage when we meet.
195-dark chocolate yummm. Have you tried chilli and raspberry flavoured dark chocolate?
200-awww, you got me excited for nothing. Bad Conor!
OMG! You KNOW Cinema Paradiso! 🙂
savannah – cool? heheh stupid more like it
jen – I used to do a great impression of beaker too
baino – oh I like the people very much, it’s the fruit I have issues with
alan – hehe sorry to disappoint
kitty – absolutely, a tircolour t-shirt would just be so wrong
manuel – as in how you fix a dog? I wanted to visit a money mint I believe
k8 – I was expelled for being a monster brat! I’m sure you are sarcoidosis free (I hope)
lottie – no such thing as too much House 😉
marjolein – a lady after my own heart you are 🙂
gaye – what a great job you did 🙂 Did you really also make excel art?
lenfercest – must have seen it ten times at this stage!
what happens when you get to post 1000?
Nope, just Publisher and Word. You are a leg-end!
Up in the small hall, so intimate, it was brilliant.
I missed out on the tix for feb, it’s on the wifeys birthday, so I might go over the odds on marktplaats.
Been back to NY many a time since.
Wot is wong with Jonathan Woss? Send me your address and I will send you a textual healing calendar….. They’re in demand….
flirty – then I retire
gaye – you must be right 😉
xbox – he’s playing two nights in Paradiso but I think both are sold out now
textual – I just find him a very arrogant man who seems to me more interested in himself than any guests he’s ‘interviewing’ – a textual healing calendar, really??
Agggh!
They usually never add dates to the paradiso so I didn’t even go back to check.
Bugger.
#1, and #27, Why?
#140, cool.
#13, #16, #18 and all the others that are continued from the one above make me laugh.
hey. I came here by accident, during googling. 🙂
and I was pretty surprised to see #120, cuz I live in South Korea(though I’ve never been to North Korea). I wonder why you wanna go there.
+ your list is a real fun!
This is the funniest, most comprehensive list I’ve ever read. If not for the creepiness factor, I’d ask you to be my best friend. : )
I know I’m over a year late with this but I just found your blog, so:
23. Jonathan Ross-
Hate this man, as much as I can hate a TV personality who I’ve never met. One of the worst interviewers ever, because he never lets anyone speak.
56.One Hundred Years of Solitude-
definitely in my top ten too.
95. I can say ‘Sit on my face but don’t hurt me’ in Tagalog-
This made me spittle a bit because I laughed so hard.
139. The only sporty type activity I do is sweaty yoga, better known as Bikram Yoga.
Me too! De Pijp or Jordaan? I go to the one on the Ceintuurbaan.
Consider me a new reader!
Whoops! Just realized you are not in Amsterdam, but The Hague! At least I think….so disregard the bikram thing!
[…] drew a map of Canada 2 09 2009 Number 20 in my list of things not worth knowing about Conortje was I love Canada and Canadians even though I’ve never been there. […]
Things to say when you suffered a brain injury and things not to say…
1. Good Morning with a smile!
2. Please and ecuse me (smile still helps).
3. Be quiet please (if you’re have or are around anyone younger than yourself).
4. Can I interrupt ( appropriatend for dealing with any age group).
5. Stop fighting please ( if you have kids or are around anyone fighting).
6. Good afternoon with a smile.
7. Have a nice day with a smile.
8. Hurry, don’t been late.
8. (I think) sent to early.
9. (I still think) where is the gym? I am stressed and needed to exercise.
10. SOrry for they confusion.
11. Goodbye…see yahoo soon! (to been continued).