After about an hour of what seemed like an excruciatingly bad remix of the soundtrack of an atari computer game my good friend Mr Heineken encouraged me to go and have it out with the DJ. ‘Do you have any actual songs back there?’ I asked her. ‘Of course I do’ she pleasantly responded looking a tad quizzicle. ‘Well are you going to play any?’ I rationally probed. ‘Of course’ she flashed with a grin.
I return to the wall I’d been propping up and true to her word three minutes later we were treated to a ‘real’ song. It was a frazzled remix of the Pussycat Dolls Dontcha. I decided I’d given enough to this club and the wall would have to go it alone. At least I didn’t spend the evening queuing to buy the new Harry Potter book I reassured myself as I plodded home.
Conortje 
Sounds familiar to me. Some so-called DJ’s could be replaced by the shuffle function of an mp3-player.
If only I could have replaced her with my mp3-player – I’d have been in heaven
Conor, it sounds as if you were there on your lonesome (except for Mr Heineken that is). That’s a bit of a shame. I’ll forward you the number for Nick’s Exceptional Escort Service (Netherlands branch) post haste. Why weren’t you surrounded by all your adoring fans? Or were THEY queuing up for Harry Potter?
Clubs are still doing that electronica shite? Music without lyrics bores the hell out of me.
Was she like 18 to top it off?
Old, your getting old Conortje old chap……
Want to feel better? I was neither in a club nor in a queue for the lastest serving from JK, I was in Tesco food shopping, How’s that for a boring night out? A few hours with Mr Heineken and some crap music is positively youthful in comparison!
Nick – I was only alone for a few minutes while my friend was busy refilling our glasses. The fans had a night off – just as well, it gets very tiresome writing all those autographs as you can imagine
Medbh – She had an age that was very hard to place. She was either 17 or 97. I’m with you on the music without lyrics front. Unless it’s clasical of course.
Manuel – you must still have fever surely!
ellie – oohh I don’t know – Tesco still has the power to excite me when I go home. They’re so big these days. You can buy all sorts of things that you don’t need. Fabulous.
Oh lord… you’ll be ashamed of me for my queueing at midnight…
well, i guess i had the best night after all! 🙂 (and i damn well deserved it) impromptu party here … sailors, pilots, navy wives and great music, lots of wine and smart conversation! and now i’m dead tired…ain’t life grand?
I’ve said it to many before; I can’t wait till I’m thirty. I am under some illusion that by then, I’ll be all Mecca-like and be wise, and charming and witty. As well as that, life will be sorted, I’ll suddenly be all handsome and stuff, and knocking back the advances of hot people with a stick.
All round general delusion, in short.
Also: “She had an age that was very hard to place. She was either 17 or 97”
Someone I work with said something similar to me a couple of weeks ago. I’m still trying to decide if it wasn’t just a big insult.
Ah, the music in my day was so much better. Oh how we used dance the night away to the strains of Mary, hold the candle steady while I shave the chicken’s lip.
was she semi-naked by any chance? seems to be a new DJ trend.
Jovica – well it’s not as fun as stumbling in drunk at 3am on the way home from a night out like we did a couple of year ago
savannah – that sound absolutely wonderful – I’m mad jealous 🙂
alan – all we can hope is that when you reach thirty you will realise that you have been all those things for many years already
Primal – At least those songs would have had words in them
Flirty – really? What is Ireland becoming I ask ya? No our one was fully clothed which was one small mercy I suppose
Uh oh, Manuel is right. The next stage after “Damn, this music is shite” is “Damn, this music is loud.”
Sadly, I have passed both those stages, and now the only music I know is from kids’ shows.
And the stage after that of course is “Did someone say music? I can’t hear anything.” Still, after what you say, that might have been an advantage….
Did you know 21 people die in the last HP? It’s sheer carnage out there.
Yes, what’s wrong with a foxtrot or a waltz? These new fangled tunes are something I don’t understand. Or what’s wrong with an irish jig or a maypole dance. I reckon all these trends will come back. You’ll have maypoling raves in another ten years mark my words.
Sparrow – oh no I think I recall giving out about the volume too. Is it too late for me???
Nick – something needs to be done. Let’s start a petition.
emma – well exactly – bring back the maypole I say!